Quote of the day...er...week...umm...hey, look, a quote!!

Tibi gratias agimus quod nihil fumas.

It says "...freedom of...", not "...freedom from...".

Nolite te bastardes carburundorum!

"It's amazing to me how many people think that voting to have the government give poor people money is compassion. Helping poor and suffering people is compassion. Voting for our government to use guns to give money to help poor and suffering people is immoral self-righteous bullying laziness. People need to be fed, medicated, educated, clothed, and sheltered, and if we're compassionate we'll help them, but you get no moral credit for forcing other people to do what you think is right. There is great joy in helping people, but no joy in doing it at gunpoint." - Penn Jillette

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The Menu

I'm drawing a blank here, folks - since the middle of last week I've been cleaning, cooking, and generally busy. It has all been for my benefit, true, because I can't stand the idea of having even one guest (because besides the people who live here and Mum, we have one guest, T's nephew who is a riot) in my home if it's messy. Obviously I don't have many visitors.

Because my brain (and the rest of me) is worn slap out, I don't have a "real" post...so...I give you the menu for Thursday's homage to gluttony (but just dinner, as the rest of our meals will be on the fly, catch-as-catch-can, don't get in my way or I'll thump you with a wooden spoon):

The Guest of Honor, Mr. Thomas Turkey. I had every intention of fetching home an organic gobbler, but they were upwards of $70 for a twelve pound bird! Yikes! Unless it shoots gold out it's arse, I ain't payin' that much for what will ultimately wind up as soup!! I split the difference and got a half-organic, instead - no hormones, antibiotics, or animal products in the feed, but not exactly free-range.

Dressing. Do you stuff the bird, or make yours in a pan? We are such dressing hounds around here, I usually do both. I am making this year's lot out of my own bread (one of the things I'm doing today is dicing the bread into cubes so it can get a little stale overnight) and may just stuff the bird with herbs. I still haven't decided yet. Dang Aquarius...

Hand whipped potatoes - I have nothing against box potatoes when I'm in a hurry (yes, they can be made palatable, and if you make a sauce or soup too thin, they're terrific for thickening it up...and why am I defending my larder to you??), but hand-whipped just transcend divine eatery, don't you think?

Gravy - homemade, thank you very much. My first holiday with T's family, I offered to make something, but they didn't want me to trouble myself...until I offered to make the gravy. It seems their gravy has come from a jar all this time. Can you imagine? How do you grow up in The South and not know how to make gravy? I am from The North and can make gravy, and we aren't exactly known for our cooking up there, you know (c'mon, y'all know it's true, The South has a reputation for cooking and hospitality)?? Now, when there's a meal requiring that savory sauce, it's my job to make it. I guess us Northern transplants are good for something besides carpet-bagging and marrying the natives, after all.

Home baked bread with store bought butter (because I draw the line at churning)(but it's Irish butter, so that makes up for it).

Plain old green beans (OK, so maybe if I have the time or inclination I'll saute them in butter and garlic...).

Mashed turnips and carrots. Yeah, it sounds a looks like a train-wreck in a bowl...but, oh my...how I adore this simple side dish! I've been eating since I was a child, and will continue to do so until I shall eat no more forever.

Corn and wild rice casserole, courtesy of Pioneer Woman Cooks - I heart PW, and this looked like a nice way to add to the rainbow of foods on the table (because until now, the yellow has been butter...ahem...). This one is making me nervous...but I am game to try it.

And finally, the absolutely necessary cranberry jelly, in absolutely the only correct way to serve is - cylindrical with a slicer. I have, in the past, made my own cranberry jelly (which may be just about the easiest thing ever to make), but I like the tinned stuff. Sigh. So much for my gourmet aspirations.

Wine. I didn't have anything to do with the making, just the buying, but I will open the bottle myself...

I always ask each person what they'd like for desert, and if I can make it, I will. This year we have:

Key Lime pie (the baked kind, not the cream cheese kind) in a shortbread crust (bought the crust, because I am that lazy).

Pumpkin pie (I will cop to buying the crust, because I SUCK at pastry crusts)

Sugar-free chocolate pie in a chocolate cookie crust, because J (our roommate) is supposed to avoid sugar, fat, and anything else that has anything remotely like flavor.

Mrs. Smith's Dutch Apple Crumb pie - because Mrs' Smith's make a damn fine apple pie, and while I can manage the filling and the crumb part OK, my crusts are lamentable.

Pecan pie - T said he would have a go at this one, but if he has to work on pie day (Wednesday, we make the pies) then I'll do it. I've never made one before, so it should prove...erm...interesting.

Vanilla ice cream (Breyer's Natural with vanilla bean flecks) and whipped cream (in a can or hand-whipped, diner's choice - not everyone is a tyrant in the kitchen like Bocci)

Also, coffee and tea on request.

I figure I'll finish up with the dishes sometime next April, and I'll probably sleep through this weekend...but it'll be worth it - I do so love to cook for the people I love...and I love everybody (I may not like them, but I do love them)...and it's all the better when we are dining in good company.

7 comments:

Will said...

Putting anything that acts as a sponge inside the cavity of a dead beast that could very easily be a bacterial breeding ground is, in a word, EVIL! Stuffing/dressing is always made on the side. Especially this year as I'm feeling quite sadistic and am making a 27 pound bird. 27 pounds for seven adults and three kids... leftovers much?

Kyddryn said...

Feel strongly about that, do you? No worries, I decided to raid the herb garden and stuff the cavity with flavor instead.

Dude - soup!!! Our turkey only lingers as leftovers for a day or so, then it becomes turkey stock and soup.

I read about your twenty-seven pound beast - that's not a bird, it's a pteronodon!

Susan said...

Shame on you. I just gained 12 pounds and ruined my keyboard with drool reading that post. I'll be there at 9 am sharp and will do ANYTHING you tell me as long as I can eat at least a little of what you described. NYOMMMM!!!!!!!!

Kyddryn said...

Bring it on, sugar - but not until at least 10 AM so I have a chance to get the turkey in and wash my hair...can't have guests when I'm all manky and gross...

If you're bringing the kids, warn a gal so she'll have some kiddie valium and slasher flicks on hand for their entertainment.

Mrs. G. said...

Yum. Happy Thanksgiving!

biz319 said...

I never liked the thought of stuffing the bird prior to baking because its raw turkey touching my stuffing, but my mom did it that way for years on end and no one got sick!

I prefer my stuffing on the side.

BTW, I am Charlie's sister from Back to the Fridge, that's how I found your blog!

Kyddryn said...

Mrs. G, I hope so, and a happy T-Day to you and yours as well.

Biz, welcome! Thanks for popping in. I dig Charlie's blog. As for dressing, well...it slows the cooking of the bird and soaks up the juices - which makes it yummy, but also leaves less for making gravy...so no stuffing in the bird this time.