Ancient Addiction

Hello, my name is K, and I am an addict. I'm so ashamed.

Every day, sometimes three or four times (or more, yes more!!) I use...sob...Greenstone Ancient Evenings lotion! I just can't seem to stop myself! I've tried...I have...but I can't resist the scent, the smoothness, how soft it makes my skin. I keep the lovely cobalt blue bottles everywhere - one in the living room, one in the bedroom, even one in my car so I can use it any time at a moment's notice. People stop me in the street and ask me what that wonderful smell is, and I offer them a taste...a few drops...to get them hooked. Then, when they crave more, when they're begging for one more squirt from the bottle...I hook them with the company and product name, so I won't be alone in my hand-made, organic, hippie-made lotion daze. The shame!!

They have bath salts...oh, the horror...bath salts that smell soooo nice, melt invitingly into a softly perfumed pool of bath water and entice a body to soak for hours without a care, without worrying about feeding the Evil Genius or cleaning the cat box or doing laundry or...sigh...

And the soap. Oh the soap! I hide it. I buy bar after bar and hide it so no one will know my dirty little secret. I keep it in my shirt drawer so I can smell it on my clothing all day long. And in my (not so) frilly unmentionables drawer, and in with my socks. When I travel, I put bars of it in my suitcase. Sometimes, when no one else is around, I pull one out and just sniff it. Bliss! There's a bar at the kitchen sink, one in Bird's bathroom (oh, shameful mother, bringing your child into this!!), one at my bathroom sink, one at my bathroom tub, and one in my shower. One is never enough...I always want more. Regular soap dishes aren't enough, either. No. I have special, hand crafted ceramic soap dishes for my bars more precious than gold.

Someone stop me before I go too far.

Oops. Too late.

If you think I'm kidding, by the way, just ask anyone who knows me - they'll tell you about the six bars of soap in my shirt drawer, the bottle of lotion in my van's cup holder, the tiny travel bottle of the stuff I always have with me...good Goddess, it's like crack for my olfactory. I asked them to let me know if they ever decided to go out of business so I could buy a few hundred bars of the soap and a fifty-five gallon drum of the lotion to get me through the few weeks it would take to find a (hardly) satisfactory replacement. And leave me the recipe so I could make more when I ran out and couldn't find anything else that came close. They laughed. I meant it.

The only time I felt even remotely like this about a "beauty" product was the Bath and Body Works Rosemary/Mint shampoo and conditioner that they stopped making as soon as I fell in love with it. And oh, dear blessed divine gods of scent, when I used the shampoo and the lotion?? Nirvana was the smell surrounding me! I fairly vibrated with the bliss.

And the funny thing, I am so not a girly-girl!

You have much love for something like that, right? I'm not alone, right??