Wait, I have HOW Long??

If all goes according to the norm (and we all know better than to hold our breath for that eventuality), I'll have a baby in about eleven weeks.

Oh. My. Blessed. Gods. And. Ancestors.

Um.

So not ready.

There's a room, true. It's even clean. There's a piece of art waiting to be framed and put on the wall. There are some of Bird's old toys and books nestled into the rack of bins I bought and assembled two weeks ago week.

There's the diaper pail I still had from Bird's infancy, just in need washing because it's been in the garage all these years (don't ask).

There are a couple of outfits in the closet - some bigger things and three or four newborn sized items, including the one outfit I (finally) bought for her even though I really couldn't spare the cash but damn it, I needed to have something, anything, that I got for her in the closet. There's the little pack of nappies that the clinic gave us.

There's...erm...yeah, that's about it.

While Someone's sister will be giving us a crib (she had twins a couple of years ago, but they never slept much in their cribs and have outgrown them - score one for us!!), and my dear friend M has offered us her youngest's outgrown stroller/car seat combo...they're not here yet. Yes, I know they're coming...but they're not here now.

There's no dresser, either - I prefer a dresser to a changing table, as I'm tall and most changing tables are inches too low for comfort - bending over to change nappies for the next few years is not appealing.

Sprout's room echoes.

We have no bedding - some is on offer from another friend, I just have to collect it. No socks, no little mittens to prevent baby fingernails from scratching delicate baby face, no bottles or wipes or diaper ointment, no burp cloths or changing pads or....

Excuse me, I can't seem to catch my breath...

It's simple, really - in the end, we will make do with what we have. Even if there was no crib, we have several laundry baskets that would do just fine to begin with. Oh, stop looking so horrified - what, you think back in the dark ages people all had nurseries? They used what they had. Towels we have a-plenty, they can double as burp cloths and changing pads. We don't really need the pack-n-play...they're right handy to have, don't get me wrong, but we can get along fine without one.

I can buy a bottle at the grocery store for a couple of bucks, and we only really need one - it can be washed as often as necessary. Honestly, I'm hoping that this time (TMI alert) I won't have to resort to formula...that maybe this time my stupid boobs will cotton on to what's expected from them and I can feed my kid without having to open a can or heat water.

She'll be born in the winter - all I need is a good blanket (and between me, Mum, and other folks I know who knit, crochet, and sew, we have that covered)(Hah! Covered!) to keep her warm.

I've been through this once before...I know how much we DON'T need. A wipes warmer? Really?? A special bottle rack for the dishwasher...umm...no thanks. An ergonomically designed, infant-sized bathtub? What's wrong with the kitchen sink?? Color coded, age specific toys that rattle, squeak, crinkle, and stimulate baby's mental development? No need...I've been saving my empty thread spools and can string them on a bootlace. She'll be entertained for months, trust me...

I'm not trying to whine, here. I am feeling a little overwhelmed. My house is a mess and Someone's mom is coming for Thanksgiving. That's only a couple of weeks away. I'd like it to be possible for someone who isn't a contortionist to walk through the living room or down the hallway. I'd like to have a slightly smaller dust-critter population and floors that don't look like we're collecting petrified cat hork in our spare time. I'd like to have clean bathrooms and a dining room table that we can, you know, dine at. Actually seeing the top surface of the kitchen table would be a bonus.

Then there's Yule, then Christmas, then...

Uh...breathing...breathing...whew...

There's more weighing on my mind, but I think I'll just spare you.

Right now I'm just muddling along, cleaning a little here, a little there, doing what I can and trying not to dwell too much on how much I can't...because ready or not, in about eleven weeks (I hope), there will be a new resident at Casa de Crazy, adding to the joyful chaos...