2 ¼ cups whole wheat flour (King Arthur rules, yo)
2 ¼ cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cups rolled oats (if you're not certain they've been rolled, get 'em drunk and send 'em down to central park around 2 AM. That oughta do it)
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
1 Tbsp sugar
2 ½ cups buttermilk (frankly, I think this stuff is nasty...except in soda bread, biscuits, and okra breading. Oh, and pancakes. But other than that, nasty.)
Heat the oven to 400°. Combine everything but the buttermilk in a large bowl and stir the ingredients with your hands - kids love doing this part. For the love of all that's holy, make 'em wash their hands before, though! Make a well in the mixture and pour in 1 1/2 cups of the buttermilk.
Continue mixing with your hands - again with the kids loving to help. Let em get gooey...it's good for their inner ear development or something. Add the remaining cup of buttermilk as you combine the ingredients. The resulting dough will be wet and very sticky.
Dust your hands with flour, shape the dough into a ball, and place it on a floured cookie sheet (we used a nonstick baking mat or Release foil). With a knife, score a deep X in the top of the ball, widening it with the sides of the blade as you cut.
Bake the bread until it's golden brown, about 50 minutes. Transfer it to a wire rack and let it cool for at least 10 minutes before slicing. Makes a crusty ( I know some folks like that), dense (I know some folks like that, too) loaf about 7 inches in diameter. Slather with butter and mmmmmmm...