Some Day This May Be Funny

This was my afternoon/early evening:

The AC froze up (it does, sometimes) and I had to turn it off, turning Casa de Crazy into something resembling a sauna.

Tried to catch a few winks, but Sprout was offended at the idea of me NOT being tired and grumpy, so she decided to clamber up onto the bed every fifteen minutes or so, just long enough for me to doze off but not get any real sleep.

Got up, went into the bathroom and wondered what the hell was all over the floor, the wall, the toilet, and why was the toilet bowl empty and what the hell happened to the cat box?!?  Ah...Sprout happened.  In between bouts of Waking Mama, she emptied the water from the toilet bowl into the cat box, making a lovely, mucky clay that she used to redecorate a little.  Lucky I'd just cleaned the box...but now I was out of litter and the box would have to be changed.

Went to the grocery store with a reluctant Sprout, spent the last of my money on something for dinner and cat litter because they refuse to use the toilet like civilized people.

Got home, got groceries out of the van and into the house, sent children outside to play.  Got the litter box squared away, cleaned the wall, floor, and toilet, came back out to the kitchen to the wailing of my daughter.  She had fallen into some dirt outside and got it in her eyes.  And boy, howdy, did she ever have some dirt in her peepers!  I peeled open one of her eyes and it was coated in crud.  I stripped her, put her in the tub, and dumped clean water over her eyes to wash them, then used damp q-tips to wipe the crud out.  She cried and hated it, but she kept mostly still and let me get it done.

After Sprout's eyes were clean, she went outside to play again, Evil Genius in tow.  I took some things down to the garage freezer and noticed something...odd...about Rosie, my beloved Astro Van.  After putting the frozen things away, I checked Rosie out.  What the...?  Powdery mildew has attacked the interior, creating a sort of furry coating on everything in there.  There's a black puddle of I-don't-know-what on the garage floor beneath her.  The battery is dead.  One of the rear tires is low.  All this in the two weeks since I last started her and let her run for a few minutes.  So now I'm down to one van running and the other is going to need towing to the service center to be worked on because even if I could start her, I'd be afraid to driver her anywhere.

As I was wiping a little of the mildew way, I started sneezing and wheezing, which, duh, I am allergic so no surprise!  A kitten began meowing piteously at me, so I had to pick him up and love him for a few minutes and I got fleas all over me for my trouble, so I had to de-shirt before coming in the house, risking blinding a neighbor in the process, but luckily he was busy in his truck and didn't notice.

I came inside to find that the living room I'd cleaned up twice already today was once again a mess and a cat had barfed up something slimy and gross right where I would usually put my foot as I was entering the kitchen, but luckily didn't this time, because I may have had to sit down and cry.

I am not a drinker, but I could learn...