How much does a dream cost?
I have a dream.
Ok, so I have a few dreams...but most of them are small things, or day dreams that are more "Wouldn't it be nice...?" and less the kind of longing, yearning, hopeful things that make one sigh wistfully in quiet moments.
But this one dream? It's kind of a big one...and it's not just mine - Mum and Someone share it, too.
I want to move.
I want to move out of Casa de Crazy and up to Mum's place - Dragon's Rest. In a perfect world, we would build a house up there, one all of us would share. In my mind, I call it the Phoenix Nest; we are trying to rise from the ashes of our former selves, constantly reinventing who we are, adjusting our sights to new highs, new lows, new unattainable distances. We burn so beautifully - why not a Phoenix?
That's such a diaphanous dream, though...so difficult to grasp, so easily rent and ravelled...
Easier, though only relatively so, is the dream of buying her neighbors place, the land adjacent to Mum's. It already has a house, a barn, and some really fine garden space. There are woods, and the house is within sight of Mum's if you know where to look.
It happens to be the place I pick blueberries every year, because her neighbor is a very nice lady.
It also happens to be off the market at the moment - she had it listed for a while,but there were no takers at the asking price...and as it was going for a song, I don't blame her for declining the low ball offers people made.
Given the right offer by the right people, though...maybe she would sell.
I suspect I'm the right people. She seems to like me. If I had the dosh, I would make an offer of exactly what she wants on the place.
I don't have the dosh, though.
I think about it every time we go up to, or come home from, Mum's. I'd like "go home" to mean a short walk down a hill rather than an hour in the van. I would like to have dinner with Mum more than once or twice a month, would like to share family time with her, would like to have a conversation with her that does not require a phone or computer, would like to be there when the day comes (and it will come) when she needs someone tohelp her with the little things, the big things, with moving into age and eventually beyond this life. I would like to be the one she calls to drive her to the ER when she gets crazy with the sledgehammer, the maul, or sharp objects (you'd be surprised how common that is...no, really, ask her).
I need a best seller, or sugar-daddy, or a patron, or a lottery win. They're all equally likely.
So, my fellow denizens of Blogopolis, my fellow floaters in the Blue Nowhere...anyone have some cash to lend? I'd pay it back...eventually...maybe in bits and pieces, maybe in chunks, but all of it and then some.
What's your dream? What do you need to attain it?