Quote of the day...er...week...umm...hey, look, a quote!!

"...besides love, independence of thought is the greatest gift an adult can give a child." - Bryce Courtenay, The Power of One

For old quotes, look here.

Saturday, November 7, 2015


For the first time in more than a year, I can park in the garage.  My friend A came down and helped me clean it a few weeks ago, and today she came and helped me do the last few little things needed to get a van in there.  There is even plenty of room for me to bring in the avocado plants for the winter and still get to the big freezer.  Bonus, when the weather is bad enough, long enough, I can back out of the garage and let them play in there!
Tonight, A and I are tackling the Evil Genius's room - we hope to clear enough that we can close his door tonight, and then tomorrow will plow through as much as we can.  It may not get all the way clean, but I have reason to believe a significant dent will be made.  A lot of clothing and toys will be going away - anything broken or too small will be tossed.  Hopefully he will not resist too much.
I am going to make Crab Rangoon tomorrow, for the first time.  It's a favorite of mine and the boy's, and learning to make it means we can have it at will rather than waiting until we can afford to go out and get them from the local Chinese place.
I started therapy two weeks ago.  I need it.  Things...things are not good at Casa de Crazy.  I am not doing well.  I am struggling.

Next week I start taking medication to help me deal with the Variety Plate.  I feel as though I am giving up, that I am weak and even more useless because I can't do this on my own.

These feelings are not founded in reality, but they feel awfully real.

I am still going to take medication because I need it, and I may not like the need, but I will honor it.
I do not think people who are not me are weak or useless because they take medication to treat their conditions.  I think they are smart and laudable.

In part it is this imbalance of thought that I am working to repair.
Today at the supermarket the young man who bagged my groceries and helped me get them out to the car mentioned that he lives in my neighborhood.  He is from the house at the top of our street, the one where they always have a Jeep Cherokee up on stands for tinkering with.  I suddenly felt old - this lad was perhaps as tall as my middle and frolicking in his yard when I last saw him, and now he's inches taller than I and working for the market.  Oy.
I miss Someone every day, fiercely, stupidly, distractingly, distressingly.  Prison doesn't just punish the offender.
My cell phone is six years old and feeling every minute of its age.  I have to replace it.  I will miss it.  The new phone will be perfectly okay, better in some ways, but I don't like change.
I swear the goldfish in the sun room tank are taunting Rook, the youngest cat.  When they perceive her near their tank, they swim to the place closest to her and wag their tails at her.  She is continually frustrated by her inability to swat the through the glass.  The sound of her paw striking the tank amuses me.  She is cross with me right now because I laughed at her.
What's new with you?


Momlady said...

Cleo is being clingy and PB is feeling left out because Cleo won't let her get near. I'll be glad when the stitches come out.

Ellen said...

Bravo. I know (better than some, and far less than others) how difficult it is to step outside your comfort zone. To admit that you aren't going to be able to force your way through it, and you need some help.
As the therapist I've been seeing for the past ten years always says, "You can't take care of others if you won't take care of yourself."