Random Shots

I'm drawing a blank, so here are some random photos...a sort of Photofetti, if you will (and even if you won't). Today I'm taking the Evil Genius to have his picture taken with The Holly King/Santa. I am thinking about dressing him in shorts and a tropical print shirt, because why not? Is there some rule that says all pictures with the big guy have to be in Winter Garb??

Then I'm hangin' with mum for the rest of the day, spending the night at her place, and going to the gallery tomorrow. Try to contain your excitement.

On with the photos.
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I made this card in September, to sell at the gallery. I try to get holiday cards made a bit early, to give them time to sell. Tomorrow, I'll be making Yule/Christmas cards. If they don't sell, guess what I'm mailing those Holly King/Santa pics off to my family in?? I hand cut all those bits of paper. Except the leaves - I borrowed a punch for those. Maybe if I'm no a complete slacker, I'll get some shots of the holiday ones. Try to contaian your excitement.

I got these crayons for three dollars at Borders - they were on sale for some reason. They're triangular and don't have paper wrappers on them. I like them.

This is my wheelbarrow, full of water because it's been sitting outside for over a year. Now I know where the mosquitoes were coming from all summer. I don't get around that side of the house much. It was supposed to be under the house in the crawl space, but never got put away despite assurances it would be. Not that I'm bitter or anything. Oh, well - it made for some pretty pictures, anyway. It's still there, quietly rusting...I'll deal with it when I get home tomorrow.

This bush...this bush glows in the Autumn, and I try to capture the way it takes sunlight, paints it crimson, and gives it back...and every year I fail. I keep trying, though.

Her highness approves of the basket of yarn oddments placed carefully in a window where there's plenty of sun. It's almost as if someone living here knows what cats like.

I think they're planning something...

A grey day outside my window, earlier this week.

Hello, little maple leaf...so bright, it caught my eye from across the yard. I like the contrast of the dark oak, with its veiny texture.

The Evil Genius preparing for a concert. Don't all rock stars keep their drumsticks down their shorts?? Never mind...don't answer that...

Blogopolis and the Blue Nowhere

It's the wee hours.

I should be home, sleeping, but instead I'm wandering around out here in the Blue Nowhere.

It always starts so innocently - I head out into my little corner of Blogopolis, the city without boundaries, the city that changes moment by moment, amorphous. The unwary must tread carefully on its streets; the largest thoroughfares are swift, where the giants fly past in their grand limousines, chased by avid fans. I prefer the side streets, where the mid-level folks dwell - their noise and bustle, their growing pains, their constant reinvention of themselves and their homes is wonderful to witness. The tiny, twisting lanes are my home, along with others of my ilk. We're not bottom feeders, quite...no, we're the quirky, the not-quite-grounded, the ones who don't have a niche or a look or a hook or whatever it is that drags a body from relative anonymity to the often hard-to-bear limelight.

So I wandered my lanes and gaze with love, adoration, admiration, and envy into the windows of other blogs. I leave my calling card and wonder if they'll notice it and come find my little home in the Blue Nowhere. I walk these little byways every day, without fail.

I went a little farther afield, though, and found myself blog-hopping. How many calories does that burn?

Branch to branch, blog to blog, farther and farther afield, until I suddenly found myself at a place only hinted at in Blogopolis lore - the edge of our city. The boundaries of Blogopolis!!

I leaped.

Who hasn't wanted to find the edge of reality and dive into the bordering possibility? Can you say you never wondered what it would be like?

There's so much to see, to do - games to play, odd little online boutiques to explore, seeking out unique, weird, and wonderful items in dusty corners, following tenuous links to new worlds- the Blue Nowhere is truly without boundaries, infinity in an atom, zipping along wires to Portugal, Australia, beyond this world and onto others.

Out in the Blue Nowhere, the electronic online world that contains and is contained by Blogopolis, swimming among the terabytes, I lost track of the hour.

Which way is home? I'll have to hitch a ride back on a passing packet and hope for the best.

Any Takers?

*This bit of random, meandering silliness brought to you by low blood sugar, lack of sleep, and a sudden inability to remember the kickin' post I wanted to write today (and you can't prove otherwise!).

I have been reading, which has prompted me to thought. Uh-oh.

Cue Disney music:
"LeFou, I'm afraid I've been thinking..."
"A dangerous pastime..."
"I know!"

So, yeah, I've been thinking about things. Political things. That smoke you smell? It's not the fires in California, the nuclear carrier George Washington, or even the barbecue joint down the street; it's the hamster wheel in my head going 'round and 'round at hitherto unheard of speeds.

My brain aches.

What have I been reading? How kind you are to indulge my nonsense by asking!

I've been reading about the Fair Tax. No fear, I won't even try to explain it here - I am barely comprehending the finer point myself, there's no way I can coherently explain it to anyone else.

It has prompted some thought, though, about our nation and its politics...including the politics of taxation.

I don't like what I see, and I would very much like it to change. I can't quite manage to understand how one percent of the populace pays thirty-something percent of the taxes, and that's OK?

Taxes aside, I often feel overwhelmed by the iniquity I see in our society - no one has satisfactorily explained to me how taking a person's home through condemnation and selling the land to WalMart is beneficial to anyone but WalMart.

So after all this reading and thinking, I have made a decision.

I am going to buy an island and start a benevolent dictatorship. Our national pastime will change seasonally and include cooking, quilting, lawn gnome placement, and the occasional bout of underwater basket-weaving. Dinner at six, don't be late.

We'll even set aside a prime bit of land for Mrs. G and her Women's Colony.

Any takers?

I've Been A-Searchin'...

Just for kicks, and probably because I was in a sleep-deprived delirium, I checked out the stat-counter thingie that tells me all kinds of interesting things like...where you're from, by country, state, city, or star sign. OK, so not the last one, but it gets pretty detailed. The function that brings the most giggles is the "key word" bit, where I can see what search words or phrases brought people to Shade and Sweetwater. Most of them are fairly mundane, so I'll ignore 'em for the moment. Below are a few that cracked me up (to varying degrees), and the things I thought as I read them.
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"sex pagan rituals braselton ga" - It wasn't me, I swear!! I don't know why this brought anyone to my page, but boy were they barking up the wrong tree!!

"winstone churchill palling" - Winston Churchill's lesser known third cousin six times removed, who was knows for his friendly demeanor and habit of buying more than his fair share of rounds at the pub.

"brain left aching" - You have my sympathies.

"saigon sin" - Once again, someone was severely disappointed.

"single, and celibate, and lonely" - Words fail. I don't have any idea when I've claimed to be the first two, although I will cop to the third...

"captain skidmarks one hit wonder" - Heh...Captain Underpants' sidekick made single that went triple platinum, but the follow-up album fell a bit flat when the drummer quit due to sartorial dissension - the drummer was a boxers man and Captain Skidmarks wanted everyone to wear briefs for a more uniform image. There was talk of a reunion, but it never went anywhere after someone leaked the story that Captain Skidmarks was addicted to cosmetic bleaching.

Overheard At the Assylum

This is an actual conversation that took place via a flurry of e-mails today - each line is an e-mail. It made perfect sense to the participants, so if you don't get it...what's wrong with you??
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M: I’m not feeling particularly inclined to engage in occupational-related pursuits today. Can I come over and hang out in your backyard? (If only it were that simple, eh?)

K: C'mon over...I'm sure you can find a simulacra to take your place at work.


M: Maybe a doppelganger?

K: Or a helium balloon in a shirt, with a Sharpie smiley face on it?

M: How about a Cabbage Patch Kid? I more closely resemble them than helium balloons.


K: Lol...yeah, but I can't stand those awful things!! I LIKE you! Maybe a blow up doll? Or a CPR torso?? Hmm...what can we use as a Michelle distraction??


M: It’s really just pointless to try – there’s simply no possible replacement for lil’ ol’ moi!


K: No, but that's the whole point...to find something so farcical that it's obvious you've snuck out, but so amusing that no one can be angry about it!!


M: Oh, well, then… How about a voodoo doll? Or a Kewpie doll? Maybe a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that’s half eaten? (There’s me, missing one of those obvious jokes again… Guess I am a real blonde.)


K: Muahaha...a fluffer-nutter on Wonder Bread, with a pickle on the side to throw them off...


M: Yeah, but who’s going to finish the package of Wonder Bread once it’s been opened?!?!


K: The ducks, of course. You did bring some ducks on this mission, didn't you? Everyone knows you NEED ducks on a covert operation! Preferably Buffleheads. They're the best sort for blending in and providing distractions. Also, I think we need some sprouts on the sandwich, or someone might think you've gone bald...and that would just be wrong.


M: I think maybe I’ll just print that email out and leave it on my chair without the rest of the conversation – I might get a hero’s welcome if I returned after that!
I know… it’s cheesy, but it’s Clip Art and it’s quick.


K: Quick, hide behind this: Now sneak out the side door...I'll send a zeppelin to fetch you and we shall drift aimlessly about in search of world domination...or pie....

M: Sweet potato or cherry?

K: French silk, duh!! Although...a nice cherry pie could definitely assuage my need for world domination...if the cherries are nice and tart and there's vanilla ice cream to be had. You know, I could forgive you forgetting the ducks of there's ice cream. I'm just sayin'...I certainly never forgot the ducks...

Never mind world domination...let's go raid the Mayfield visitor's center instead. We can wear cow costumes and pretend to be on a pilgrimage...they'd never suspect a thing! I'd need to get a pedicure first, though...I wouldn't want my hooves to look bad when visiting Mecca. What do you think...sparkly pink hoof polish? Or just a classic, understated clear coat?

Oh, and ahem..re: printing the conversation...do you not read your own tag line????? You know, about being kind to the environment and stuff?? Gee whiz...
~~~~~

You'll note that M was clear headed and sensible in the beginning, and that K (who is this K? Where does she come from? Why isn't she contained safely behind a firewall somewhere?) dragged the sensible M right into Crazy, population: Us Them! What are friends for?