I was trying to have a no-yell day.
Fail.
In my defense: I tried to take a nap but the Evil Genius and Sprout decided that THAT was the time to sit in her room and build block towers...to knock over. Then when I hollered at them to cut it out because LOUD, and please put the blocks away because Marvelous Mizz A literally worked her butt off (it's two sizes smaller, now) cleaning that room and it WILLBYGODDESS stay clean for more than a minute, so they put some of the blocks away...by throwing them into the bins from across the room.
Sigh.
I hollered about that.
Then Sprout decided that she had to express her musical genius. On the xylogator.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the common rainbow xylogator, this one somewhat less loved than the one currently residing in Sprout's room.
The xylogator is a wee loud in the best of circumstances. When Mama's trying to get a little much-needed rest? Not the best of circumstances.
So I hollered about that.
Then Sprout decided that she should lie down with me. She really is a cuddle bug and most of the time it's just fine for her to snooze with me, but today was not most of the time. Today was one of the days when she simply HAD to play games on her Papa's phone. With the volume all the way up. And her definition of "be still" is a little flexible - sometimes she will lie still, but sometimes? It's like trying to sleep in a mixing bowl when the mixer is set to "high". And then being tossed into a threshing machine. And then being run through a laundry mangle. An industrial one.
So I hollered about that.
Then Sprout decided that she should lie down with me. She really is a cuddle bug and most of the time it's just fine for her to snooze with me, but today was not most of the time. Today was one of the days when she simply HAD to play games on her Papa's phone. With the volume all the way up. And her definition of "be still" is a little flexible - sometimes she will lie still, but sometimes? It's like trying to sleep in a mixing bowl when the mixer is set to "high". And then being tossed into a threshing machine. And then being run through a laundry mangle. An industrial one.
So I grumbled and then hollered about that.
Then I decided I may as well get up and get dinner started, which meant going downstairs and fetching some shrimp from the freezer because I want some kind of shrimp pasta and broccoli for dinner and it won't make itself (because that would require sentient, non-frozen shrimp and then I couldn't eat them because eating sentient beings could be viewed as rude, especially by the erstwhile dinner), and the freezer was a right mess because the Evil Genius's idea of putting things neatly where they belong in the freezer is defined as "Just toss that shit anywhere so I can get back to gaming or talking on the phone ASAP".
So I hollered about that.
Then I went into the living room and saw that all the lounge cushions were scattered on the floor despite my having asked the Evil Genius to put it back together again, and the clean laundry I had folded and placed carefully on the table to be joined by more clean laundry later was scattered all over the floor, and MY brand new pencil box had been played with despite clear instructions not to so much as breathe near it (because I know kids, my kids especially, and they WILL find a way to mess with things without explicit directions) and the tag removed and the hasp bent so that now I will not be able to latch it properly shut, and the 3-D puzzle ball that USED to be on the upper shelf on the bookcase in the dining room was once again in pieces and left by my place at the dining room table for me to reassemble, and I may have hollered a little about that.
Then I decided I may as well get up and get dinner started, which meant going downstairs and fetching some shrimp from the freezer because I want some kind of shrimp pasta and broccoli for dinner and it won't make itself (because that would require sentient, non-frozen shrimp and then I couldn't eat them because eating sentient beings could be viewed as rude, especially by the erstwhile dinner), and the freezer was a right mess because the Evil Genius's idea of putting things neatly where they belong in the freezer is defined as "Just toss that shit anywhere so I can get back to gaming or talking on the phone ASAP".
So I hollered about that.
Then I went into the living room and saw that all the lounge cushions were scattered on the floor despite my having asked the Evil Genius to put it back together again, and the clean laundry I had folded and placed carefully on the table to be joined by more clean laundry later was scattered all over the floor, and MY brand new pencil box had been played with despite clear instructions not to so much as breathe near it (because I know kids, my kids especially, and they WILL find a way to mess with things without explicit directions) and the tag removed and the hasp bent so that now I will not be able to latch it properly shut, and the 3-D puzzle ball that USED to be on the upper shelf on the bookcase in the dining room was once again in pieces and left by my place at the dining room table for me to reassemble, and I may have hollered a little about that.
Imagine the one on the upper right, only in pieces.
I swear, lately it's like I can't leave a room (or the yard) without things being knocked over, broken, torn, scattered, spilled and not cleaned up, mashed, crushed, banged, whanged, slammed, eaten, dirtied, stained, crashed into, killed, removed, slashed, cut, and otherwise destroyed. Seriously, not even for a few minutes. They're like rabid weasels on a meth-fueled tear.
Sigh.
Tomorrow, perhaps I will manage not to yell - after all, I'm supposed to go out for a few hours with a friend while roommate D minds the children. What could there be to yell about?
Umm...should I take out extra insurance?
Take out insurance.
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