Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Umm...Okay...But Why Is It My Business?

Casa de Crazy doesn't have regular television.  No cable, no satellite, we rely on T's Netflix account for entertainment, so when things happen out there in the world I usually learn about it via Facebook or word of mouth.

Apparently one of my favorite actresses, Jodie Foster, received an award last weekend.  While making her acceptance speech, it seems she may have mentioned something about being...gay?

I must pause here to mention that I have not looked at one single moment of the many videos of her speech, nor have I read any transcripts from or full articles about it.  I have merely seen some headlines and some people's reactions to it.

So what I am wondering is twofold.

First, was there anyone who didn't know that she paddled on that side of the canoe, or at least rowed on both sides of the boat?

Second, umm, this matters why?

What business is it of mine with whom she sleeps or who she loves or takes up housekeepery with?  Providing she isn't doing anyone any harm, I don't honestly care.  I don't mean that in a angry, hurtful, mean kind of way - I wish her, as I do any being, a life of happiness and fulfillment.  My estimation of another person is not linked to their sex life.  Again, as long as no one is being hurt, I don't much care what kind of kink, vanilla, celibate or slutty lifestyle a body is living.

While I laud Mizz Foster for being herself, unabashedly, I just don't think it's my business.  Sexual activity is personal.  It is between the consenting participants.  It has nothing to do with whether I will watch a movie or read a book or listen to a song - THAT had everything to do with talent or lack thereof, and that I DO care deeply about.

Why have we become a culture that demands more than simply living one's life with honesty?  Why have we become a culture that demands that people, especially celebrities, announce publicly something so private?  Why does it matter?

7 comments:

  1. Quite frankly I could care less about her sex life...or that of any other celebrity. Is she bragging or complaining? Who cares??

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  2. She didn't announce that she was gay. Her big news was that she's single. Just sayin'. It was a ridiculously bizarre and confusing speech. She hinted that she is retiring then immediately stepped away from that. She was just.plain.weird.

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  3. I could give a 'rat's ass' on how people live their lives. Do what you do & do what makes you happy. As long as you're not harming me, my family or friends - do what you do & be happy with your life.

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  4. Susan, cheers - headline after headline, comment after comment made it about being gay, which is why I wanted to be clear I hadn't watched or read the speech myself. I still don't know why her romantic life is any of my concern...

    Shade and Sweetwater,
    K

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  5. As someone who paddles on that side of the canoe myself, I can say that she didn't announce it for your information, she did it for my sake and for people like me.
    Yeah, everyone already "knew" it, but you'd be surprised how many people didn't want to know it. I encounter that all the time.
    Quite frankly, every prominent, successful queer that comes out, makes it safer for the rest of us.
    Granted, I don't face the discrimination folks did, say 30 yrs. ago, but I know folks who do, and stay in the closet for their physical safety, their jobs, so their families don't disown them.
    For kids just discovering that they're different, themselves, and perhaps feeling very alone in it, her announcement lets them know that "we are everywhere." And they can look forward to a life where they can be authentic and successful.

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  6. As someone who also paddles on that side of the canoe, I can tell you, she didn't make that announcement for you - she did it for folks like me.
    I don't face the kind of discrimination now that I would have, say, 30 yrs. ago, but I know people who do, and who stay closeted for the sake of a job, their physical safety, or so their families don't disown them.
    For someone like that, or for a teenager in a similar situation, her announcement offers hope. It lets them know that they can hope to live authentic, successful lives.

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  7. AA, thanks for sounding a response - what bothers me is the necessity. No one should have to feel the need to hide them self - there is no shame in loving...or, anyway, there shouldn't be. I am saddened by the NEED for bolstering, and distressed that there still seems to be some social value placed on sexuality in this fashion - I don't think who you love/are attracted to should determine your place in this world, as long as it is safe, consensual, and doing no harm.

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