I feel myself in a peculiar place.
Familiar, in some ways, but peculiar none the less.
I feel myself straddling a line between two worlds, two lives, equaly in both, fully in neither. I've been here before, mind - the days when I am dazed, feeling displaced as I often do, wondering why I am in this house, with these people, living this life, when they are not mine. My life is elsewhere, elsewhen. I don't live in Georgia...I live in the mountains out west. Not in a house, in a cabin. I don't have a child, I have a garden. I know this feeling.
And yet...
And yet, it is different. The line I straddle now is the border between what has been and what may be. What is and what could be. What I have and what I want. What I know and what I hope for.
Feet planted on either side, I am anchored by one and yearn toward another and so am balanced on a razor-thin edge, careful of how I go lest I slip and am cut to ribbons.
I do know that feeling. It's exciting and frightening at the same time, and it sure does lead to loose bowels and restless nights. Hugs to you, dear sister.
ReplyDeleteThat's why I always did what I wanted, at the time I wanted, with the money I didn't have.
ReplyDeleteI hear your voice now when i read your words-- nay, even when I see the Morning Glory at the top o' the page...
ReplyDeleteAnd you know... [and you DO you Do you DO..;P], je comprends the straddling...
I am na Nor want to be HERE... but am.
But dreaming of a mountain garden...
"MAY BE", hades, my Flower... it IS.
I do I do I do...
Or mayhap i meant
ReplyDeleteit is It is it IS...