Tomorrow, we are done - leaving the site, wending our way home, we'll drive as far as we can before stopping for the night. By Monday night, I'll be home.. I have no idea what my home will look like - T was going to spend this week moving his things out...but he's so angry...so hurt...I just don't know if he'll remember that he said he would never hurt me.
I can understand his need to make me hurt in equal measure. What he doesn't understand is...I already do.
So today, I will be packing. I've already done a little - laundry tidied away, some of Bird's toys and games contained in a bag for the trip home, food sorted through and eaten or given away or made ready for the pot-luck tonight.
An aside - at these long events, we have a "please don't make me take this food home" potluck. Everyone brings their leftovers, the stuff the could bring home but don't want to, and we all have a feast. I try to burn all my remaining charcoal and wood chunks, because I don't want to bring them home. There's always more than enough to feed a small army...even if it's a hungry pagan one.
As much as I've enjoyed this place, this time...there are things need taking care of at home. I've spent most of this week worrying about those things at odd moments, trying to be here, to enjoy the music, the people, but...niggling in the corners, in the shadows, are these...concerns...and I'll be glad to get home and face them.
Meanwhile, I am packing out today, and heading home to you, my dear friends in the Blue Nowhere...and I can't wait...
I would never do anything to hurt you, your mother, or your mother's house. Just so you know I just deleted a lot of stuff from this comment that I really wanted to say. Then I realized that if you need to use this blog to make me look like an ass in front of all your friends, so be it. Boy do we have a lot to talk about when you get home. I think the house should be the least of your worries.
ReplyDeleteI do and always will love you but right now I feel like I never really knew you.
Tony
I like the potluck idea-- a good close to a great community binding. No waste, and food is always appreciated!!
ReplyDeleteBe safe on the road, Lady...