Friday, April 24, 2009

Pele's Burn

I have so much to do today. Most of it's good, but I feel stressed. The twenty-four hours in one day are not enough just now, and I'm beginning to feel pulled in many directions at once.

By the end of the day I'll have driven for two hours for a three hour appointment that includes hauling the Evil Genius along...but he'll get his Mohawk haircut with green (I hope) tips that he wants, so I get to feel delighted and a wee overindulgent, too. Then two hours home. How I suffer for my art. Heh.

Y'all, my hair doesn't get blue on its own!

I will have baked bread, packed clothing for the weekend at the Ren Fest, written a grocery list and shopped. I will, hopeful, have mended my Ren costume where it needs a little love from the needle.

I will have tried, if not succeeded, in cutting and marking more sarongs to turn into shirts, although when I'm actually going tog et the sewing done is beyond me. Maybe Monday night? Tuesday night? I have no idea.

I will have pre-blogged some entries for the weekend and next week, because on the weekend I'm at the Ren Fest and on Wednesday I'm heading to Florida Pagan Gathering to perform and will not have a computer at either event.

Throughout all of this, I will be hauling around a curious sort of simmering anger/resentment/distress that is bubbling along under the surface, waiting for a chance to erupt.

I love Pele - how she flashes, dances, burns so bright, creates even as she destroys. I love her passion, that transforms even as it consumes.

I love that she has taken root in my soul, near Boadicea but not too near, across from Fand and Liban and Oshun - the fire Goddess near the water goddesses, the healing goddess, oddly comforting. Pele is one my family could understand, the burning one. We do fire well, as some of you have read before. But I also do water well. Contradictions abounding.

Love her though I may...I could wish that, just now, she could give the tempering of my life, my inner being, a break. I'm exhausted and blistered by her presence, and I think I need a rest.

Sorry...not much lyrical, today, not much funny or insightful...just me, trying to muddle through...

5 comments:

  1. I am true believer that muddling through is a key to survival. If you keep moving - albeit slowly - you'll be okay. Blue hair? Where's the picture??? Please?

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  2. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swi....huh?

    Alas, delightful yellow flag, there are no pictures of me on the Internet. Well, there's that one, but I try not to thnk about it...

    Ahem.

    Perhaps I can find a way to post one of just my hair...but the rest of me will have to remain a mystery for a while longer. Just picture a five-foot, ten-inch middle-aged, dumpy female with waist-length hair (blue bangs and tips), no boobs to speak of, a fifty-acre ass, foul disposition and the manners of a troll...and there I am!

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  3. It does sound as though you're BURNING the candle at both ends and holding a lighter to the middle though I am a bit jealous of your productivity. Please take care of yourself so you don't burn out!

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  4. Hmmm...

    I am of the Sea.. and Air. For I am swan.

    My progeny was brought into existence on Pele's face-- born on Honolulu, Hawaii [on the 4th of July, no less!]

    Ireally wouldn't know how ELSE to be, but contradictory...

    Or, better defined, BALANCED.

    Yes...
    Balanced. THAT rings right, don't it?!?

    Have fun @ the fests, Lady...

    Slainte!

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  5. Ahh, the mental picture...

    KNEW I was in love, K...

    :D

    C.

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